“But the father said to his servants, ‘Quick! Bring the best robe and put it on him. Put a ring on his finger and sandals on his feet. Bring the fattened calf and kill it. Let’s have a feast and celebrate. For this son of mine was dead and is alive again; he was lost and is found.’
Luke 15: 22-24

It was the fall of 2009. I was crashing on cortisol and overdrive and my ex-husband and I had just had the most devastating fight ever – over, I kid you not, water.

I found myself in a Starbucks parking lot an hour later, cruising past several radio stations when the words “I dare you to move, like today never happened” grabbed me.

I normally skipped quickly over the Christian radio stations – they always made me feel a little guilty. God, I’m just not ready to come back. I feel too far away from you. I feel dirty. I feel guilt and shame. I did it my own way, and I was wrong.

But in that moment, Jesus met me. He put his arms around me, and in my spirit, I felt comfort and peace like a big bear hug from my Daddy and I let the tears roll. It’s okay, you’re home.

Most of us know the Parable of the Prodigal Son. It becomes so much more real when you’ve squandered your inheritance and kingdom treasures for the world, and come crawling back to your Heavenly Father wrecked and in rags.

You guys, I made a mess of my life. And being really vulnerable, I shouldn’t have married my ex-husband. Looking back, we weren’t ready to get married. We fought all the time. We were missing a common perspective on how we were going to live out our values in the world, and in the end, that is what pulled us apart.

We both made mistakes and we were both at fault. Sometimes marriage, as so many of us know from experience, just doesn’t work out. We make the best choices we can at the time and we learn from them. This is experience. This is life.

I’m not being honest if I don’t own how disgraced I felt that day in the car parked outside Starbucks, when the heavy truth dropped on me. I had been insincere. I had withheld pieces of myself from my ex-husband. The emotions were raw and I was ashamed.

Yet, God met me right there in the mud of mixed motives and tangled outcomes, and he took back my dirty rags and said, You’re beautiful, my child, and my love for you is everlasting. Once you were dead and now you are alive again!

  
God doesn’t ask for or demand perfection – he loves us unconditionally, and he seeks our surrendered hearts. For this reason he leaves the ninety-nine to chase after the one. For the same reason the Prodigal Son receives a homecoming feast. God cherishes us!

I’m not a parent, but for my parents out there, you get it. Your kid(s) can’t do anything to escape your love. Even if they tried. Because you would DIE for them.

Love really is that simple. God is love and light. God is infinite wisdom and absolute truth. God is I AM. He is perfect and he is the standard. We are his children reconciled to him through the sacrifice of his one and only son Jesus Christ. And we die to our old selves and take up a new life when we choose to follow Jesus. We don’t deserve such grace, but God kills the fattened calf and celebrates our homecoming anyway.

Within the year, I got a new Bible, and I read with discipline and a sincere desire to know God. I went back to church. The divorce happened. Summer came.

One warm night that summer, I prayed out loud and asked Jesus to be Lord of my life, in these simple words. I’d prayed this silently before as a young adult, but sincerely confessing my need for a savior out loud changed everything. I came home, there was a feast, and we celebrated.

God, I’ve made a mess of my life and my life is messy, will you make me right and come into my life and my heart and take over? Because what I’m doing isn’t working. I realize I need your direction more than ever, and I trust you.

Do you have a prodigal story of your own that you’d like to share? We’d love to hear from you! Just drop us a quick email and we’ll reach out.